:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
He is an equal opportunity slut.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Randomize
