Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
