i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
