so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize