i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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