Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
