Having a random hookup so left but love u
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
