just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize