I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
