So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
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