I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize