Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
