Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
