I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
