I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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