if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
