Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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