Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
