I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Randomize
