I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
