Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Randomize
