what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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