upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
