The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
