Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize