Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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