Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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