I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
