so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
