is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
and she was petting her beer can
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots