I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I love how my cats smell like pot.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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