we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
If its not for food we ain't going out.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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