from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
ugly people sure do ruin things
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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