Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
