those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
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she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
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i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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