Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
