whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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