Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Use "feeling words"
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.