they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
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