did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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