Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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