Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Randomize