S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
