i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
