am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I lost the right to judge tonight
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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