Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize