Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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