I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Randomize
