So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single