we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
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