Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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